Describe a place you would like to visit in your free time

Band 6

I would like to talk about Issyk-Kul, which is a big mountain lake in the north of Kyrgyzstan. I want visitMissing “to”: should be “have wanted to visit” it since my uncle comeTense slip: should be “came” back from there with many photographs. It is a long journey from my city, so I goTense slip: should be “would go” by bus and then by taxi along the shore. I would stay for four days in a small guesthouse in a village, not in a bigBasic adjective; limits Lexical Resource hotel. In the day I would walk on the beach, take a boat on the water and go to the mountains for a hike, and in the evening I sitTense slip: should be “I would sit” outside and look at the mountains. ErNatural hesitation marker, minor filler, the reason I would like to go is that I work in a room with a computer all week and I want to be in a place where it is very quietBasic phrasing; limits Lexical Resource. I also want to eat the food of the local families and talk with them, because I think it is the best part of a trip, and I think I will remember it for a long time after I come back home, even if the trip is not long.

Band 7

I’d like to talk about Issyk-Kul, a large mountain lake in the north of Kyrgyzstan, which I’ve wanted to visit ever since my uncle came back from there with a camera full of photographs. It’s a long journey from my city, so I’d probably go by bus and then by shared taxi along the shore. I’d plan to stay for four days in a small guesthouse in one of the villages rather than in a big resort. During the day I’d walkingVerb form error: should be “walk” along the beach, take a boat out onto the water and hike up a gorge, and in the evenings I’d just sit outside and watch the mountains turn pinkVivid, precise image. The main reason I’d like to go is thatClear discourse marker introducing the explanation my weeks are spent in front of screens, and I’d love to get away from it all, somewhere where the loudest sound is the waterDefining relative clause that adds a precise picture. I’d also like to eat what local families eat and talk to them, because that’s the part of a trip I tend to remember longest, and I think a few days like that would do me a lot of good.

Band 8

I’d like to talk about Issyk-Kul, a large mountain lake in the north of Kyrgyzstan, which I’ve wanted to visit ever since my uncle came back from there with a camera full of photographs. It’s a long journey from my city, so I’d probably go by bus and then by shared taxi along the shore. I’d plan to stay for four days in a small guesthouse in one of the villages rather than in a big resort. During the day I’d walk along the beach, take a boat out onto the water and hike up one of the gorges behind the village, and in the evenings I’d simply sit outside and watch the mountains turn pink. What draws me there is the thought of a place where the loudest sound is the waterCleft sentence with a relative clause for emphasis, since my weeks are spent in rooms full of screens. I’d also hope to eat what local families eat and talk to the people who live there, because that’s the part of a trip that stays with you longestNatural, idiomatic reflection.